I have a question that I want to throw out there & I am really interested on people's stand. Where do you draw the line in inviting people to do things? Where do you stop inviting people so the group doesn't get so large? Let me give examples so you better understand what I am asking.
Say I want to have some neighbor friends over for a play group, I invite 3 friends over with their kids & we have a great time! Well, so-&-so down the street found out about it & was offended. She speaks to another so-&-so & she becomes offended also. The fact is, I can't fit more than a couple friends & their kids comforably in my house without it feeling overly chaotic & crowded.
Another example. A bunch of neighborhood friends want to go out for a Girls Night Out. You invite 10 to 15 people & think that is a very large group already & stop the invites. Well, again, people find out & are offended they weren't invited.
So where do you draw the line? Do you stop doing things all together because people will be offended? This has been a question on my mind for almost a year now. Someone always seems to be offended that they weren't invited but it just isn't possible or realistic to invite 50 people to EVERY.SINGLE.THING you plan. I have things that I want to start up & do with some people, but I haven't dared move forward with them because I am afraid of people being offended that they weren't invited.
What are your opinions on the subject? The dilemma seems to be within the neighborhood/ward boundaries where everybody knows each other. Because of doing things with a smaller group, people get upset & start saying that our neighborhood is clicky.... so ate you not aloud to have a group of friends? I am quite frustrated with this subject & am honestly confused where you are supposed to draw the line.
4 comments:
Personally, I think you plan what you want to and invite who you want to, PERIOD! If someone is offended they choose to be offended and it is not your fault. I've found most people won't do the planning or inviting but they're always offended if they're not invited. They should take the initiative and start their own groups and get- togethers. Live your life and do what you want to do. Don't let others stop you from having fun, learning, and growing and helping other friends do the same thing!
Don't worry about it! Like you said, someone will ALWAYS be offended. Most of them just want to find something to be offended about. You're entitled to have your own friends. After all, not everything has to turn into a "ward activity."
It does get tricky and I have worried about the same thing several times. We try to do get togethers with small groups and switch off and rotate through our friends. And honestly people have to get over it and be adults. You try your best and can't always make everyone happy, that's just life.
My mom always used to say "He who takes offense when no offense was intended is usually a fool. He who take offense when offense is intended is always a fool. You have the right to live your life. You have to do what feels right for you. People need to understand that it is impossible to include or please everyone. I am sure most of us never mean to offend anyone.
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